Flexibility & Creative Thinking: a 10-Step Plan to Intercultural Survival

Flexibility and its buddy-concept “thinking on your feet”:
the keys to living in Chile.

Plans keep going awry? (always wanted to use that word!) Can’t figure out the rules? Wondering why it’s just so damned hard to get anything done around here? Ah! Culture shock strikes again!

Best laid plans of mice and expats…

(Sorry, couldn’t resist!) Many people–expats, exchange students, and visitors alike–trying to adapt to life in another culture often find themselves frustrated by plans that always seem to come undone, and learning the skills of flexibility and creative thinking can go a long way to making life much more comfortable.

It’s all well and good to make a plan, but you just can’t get bent out of shape every time your finely honed scheme runs smack up against some unexpected firewall. You’re playing by someone else’s rules—most of which are pretty seat-of-the-pants, not-so-carved-in-stone anyway, so get used to it. Keep your eyes and ears open, observe how locals handle the challenge, and just plain get over yourself.

And in case you’re wondering… no, I am not one of those goody-goody, smiley-smiley, inherit lemons-make-lemonade kind of people—although come to think of it, I could totally see myself putting the squeeze on those lemons for a mega-batch of pisco sours! I spend plenty of time spluttering and groaning about the inconveniences of plans set off-kilter or that have full-fledged belly-smacked into the trash, but attempts at salvage whatever mental health I have left finally led me to this approach: Why keep banging your head against the wall when you can step back and see that there’s a door just 2 steps to the left?

It used to drive me crazy to be invited to do something only to discover that the plans had changed midstream and we’d ended up someplace completely different. I thought it was my lack of language (I could have SWORN he said we were going to Ivan’s house… why are we at this bar?). But no; just a last-minute change of plans. Or—for you English teachers out there—how about all the time you spend preparing a lesson plan only to hear your private student say (upon arrival) “oh, sorry, I can’t meet with you today, please have a class with my secretary.” Um… teaching what, might I ask? Or, you have a business meeting scheduled with someone at 11:00 AM, they keep you waiting til 1:00, and then you discover they’ve gone to lunch? OK, that one was just plain rude any way you look at it, but you get the picture.

So what to do… You could pitch one whopper of a fit—and sometimes it is completely warranted and just plain feels good to get it all out there… alright, go ahead, you’ll feel better for a little while, but it’s going to happen again and all that blustering fit-babble loses its power after a while, so how do you get ready for NEXT time? (Ah, caught that, did you? Yes, there will be a next time–it’s something hard-wired into the respective cultural motherboards).

10 Steps to Intercultural Survival

1-     Be flexible.

2-     Believe in Murphy’s Law. If there’s a monkey wrench in the vicinity, it will, more often than not, find a way into your plans.

3-     Develop the ability to think on your feet. Having a Plan B isn’t enough, be prepared to invent Plan G at a moment’s notice.

4-     Quit complaining. Nobody likes a whiner, especially an arrogant one.

5-     Don’t expect too much—of yourself or of anyone else. It’s good to set the bar high, but you are not going to be fluent in language or culture overnight.

6-     Be patient. Yes, I know this ties in with number 5, but it’s important and I’m trying to get up to 10!

7-     Remember that you are on someone else’s turf—it’s YOUR job to adapt, not the other way around. If “they” seem to be doing something strange, turn it around to see what it is that YOU are doing that rubs against the grain. It’s the old “when in Rome” advice. Doesn’t mean you have to force your feet into pointy high heels or bare your cleavage to your navel, but don’t be surprised when you don’t fit in when dressed as a gringa gone camping.

8-     Be self reliant. Be able to entertain yourself. You will probably spend a lot of time alone, at least at first until you get to know people to hang out with.

9-     Relax. Figure out when it’s ok to run late, when it’s expected, when it’s not, and when it is absolutely not ok to fiddle with the schedule. I’d say, for work, be on time—not that the other party will be, but at least you’re showing that you’re serious and respecting their time. For dinner invites—not so much. Getting there on time will most definitely mean you spend time alone with the dog while hosts finish showering, cooking, and last minute fussing. Give them about 10–15 minutes fudge room. And if you’re trying to catch an inter-city bus, by all means, be there ahead of time. When it says it leaves at 10:15, it means it’s already half way down the block.

10- Remember the Golden Rule. Treat others the way you would like to be treated yourself. With respect, patience, and a bit of flexibility! It may not change their behavior, but at least you’ll have that little tingle of pleasure that comes with knowing that you’re the one on the more comfortable side of that forthcoming apology!

Speaking Chilensis: beware the Fake False Cognates

It’s time for another lesson in Chilensis, in Chilean Spanish, and in those sneaky little false cognates that can trick you into saying things you really had no intention of saying at all.  And as every language learner discovers, just when you least expect it, you’re bound to stumble—or even dive headlong—into the quirky linguistic pitfalls of new language acquisition. And since I’ve probably fallen into and crawled red-faced out of most of them, I thought I’d pass along a little more advice on staying out of linguistic trouble.

Once again from the “boy was my face red” school of learning Spanish by experience, I bring you yet another chapter of dumb stuff the gringa said:

We’ve already flirted with frugal and explored the cynical vs cínico, and by now there’s certainly no reason to even get into embarrassed vs embarazada (if you don’t know the difference, go look it up right now! Or you will most certainly be embarrassed, although that in itself will probably not make you embarazada).

But oh there are plenty more treacherous traps of the tongue just lying in wait. Lots more. Here are a handful for today’s giggles at the gringa’s expense.

Support vs Soportar (v): The two look pretty close, don’t they? Uh-uh. Nix-Nay-Nein, and No po’. Support, as in to hold, to help, to back up, to stand behind, to keep from falling, to provide for… right? Take a look in your bilingual dictionary and you get ayudar, apoyar, respaldar, and mantener. Not a single soportar in the lot. OK, so now try the other way. Look up soportar and you get withstand, endure, put up with, tolerate. Yikes!

How well I remember how I learned—the hard way, of course—about this seemingly innocent pair. Many years ago, when I was still pretty much a babe in the Spanish-speaking woods, I was interviewing a woman who had been the victim of human rights violations. I wanted to know what kind of support her group received from other countries and asked “¿Cómo les soportan?” She jerked upright, looked at me kind of funny, smiled to herself, and answered my question. I didn’t get it at the time, but months later—and at a much better level of Spanish—I was transcribing the interview tape and was horrified to hear myself ask the equivalent of “How do they stand you?” Lord… How did SHE stand all the Spanish-deficient do-gooders who kept showing up at her door?

And then there are those words that are probably not really false cognates in a true linguistic sense, although in the every day practical sense they work the same way. Hmm, I guess that makes them Fake False Cognates.

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Ha! News Flash! I just coined a brand new expression! I just googled “fake false cognates” and got zip! Specifically:

No results found for “fake false cognates”.
Cool!
And you read it here first! The fake false cognates are mine… feel free to write me up a wiki for that one!
Ok, back to business:

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There are a number of words that seem to be the same, and even technically ARE the same, although common usage dictates that the first sense that comes to your listener’s mind may not be the first one comes to yours.

Ordinary vs Ordinario (adj): Once again. The hard way. I made a comment to the same group of women about them being mujeres ordinarias. Even now I cringe to think about it! No, no, and NO. Do NOT say that to perfectly nice, ordinary, everyday grandmotherly type older women. They don’t like it. And neither would you. While “ordinary” just refers to some normal, usual, or common sort of person or thing, and while my friend the DRAE tells me some pretty similar things up front, it quite quickly gets to the part about bajo, basto, vulgar y de poca estimación. Even if you don’t speak much Spanish, you did get the part about vulgar, right? Yes indeed. In Chile that’s the definition they jump to first, so I basically told these kindly wives and mothers that they were pretty low class losers with innuendos of questionable virtues and loose mores. I swear it’s a good thing that there had been a long line of well-meaning language innocents who had come before me, so I’m sure they had heard it all before or worse, or they would have thrown me out right then and there!

Regular vs Regular (adj): Couldn’t possibly be more alike, right? Twins even… except one is REG-u-ler, and the other is reg-u-LAR. The first describes your average, normal (ok, ordinary) kind of things: coffee, car, style, student, grades, while in the latter (read Chilean) case, regular is just not good enough. It turns out that reg-u-LAR is pretty not-so-good. A student who is reg-u-LAR might not graduate. Someone whose style is reg-u-LAR is pretty sub-par among those who care about such things. Fortunately, I don’t think I’ve ever called anyone reg-u-LAR when I didn’t mean it.

At least not yet…

Want to know more silly stuff that gringas say? And hey–this is not just for laughs! This is serious stuff… we’re cluing you in on ways that YOU can avoid making the same mistakes! (And this works in both directions–all you Spanish speakers will (1) have a clue as to what we really mean to say and (2) turn it around to avoid making the mistake when speaking English!

Check out:
Abby takes a sinus infection to heart… er… breast: “You have an infection WHERE?”
Clare muses on teenaged self defense : “Not quite there: Commentary on Communication“

Books, Computers, Cameras: Tools & Tickets

I’ve been pensive this morning. Thinking about stuff. Literally. Material things and what is important, which brings me to issues of experience, travel, photography, and most of all, memory.

It all started with a good read. I saw a short and insightful post over on a great travel blog called Uncornered Market. The piece, “Are you a Stuff Junkie or an Experience Junkie” (yes, yes… go ahead… click, read, you know you want to… it’s short and we can talk about it when you get back) sets the tangible and intangible at odds and hits the personal priority question square on its pointy head.

The wanderlusts among us know their answer (Fly away!).
So do the homebodies (Nest!).

Although I have certainly thought about this issue (and plenty: shall I stay or shall I go? shall I buy or shall I fly?), I had never put it in such a Levi-Straussian binary-oppositional sort of way. And that post set me off on a bit of existential pondering that brings me to this:

I’m in it for the experience.

There’s just too much good stuff going on out there somewhere to stay put, physically or mentally. I am inquieta (one of those great Spanish words that has no real translation into English). I want to know more, see more, do more, drink it in… and then share it. That’s me. That’s who I am and who I have always been.

The fact that I am a voluntary expat (and blog about it) is pretty good evidence of that. And though I’ve been here in Chile a long time, and yes, have accumulated a lot of STUFF in the process, what I just realized is that most of it—the stuff I value most—is experience-related stuff. Not clothes, not fancy furnishings, not much of anything sold in the local department store…

So what are the things I value most? Books, computers, and cameras. They are all tools and tickets to the experiences–past, present, and future–that truly mean so much.

Books, Computers & Cameras

Books. I have a lifelong love of books and magazines. I grew up in the country and they were my lifeline and ticket to anywhere and everywhere.

Computers. No, I am not a geek. Was once, in a former life long ago, but not now. Today my computers are the tools that let me reach out beyond the physical limits of my world. Again, anywhere and everywhere.

Cameras. Ah… now here is where the plot thickens… Photography is another lifelong love, and aside from fulfilling an artistic itch, I have just come to realize this morning, after reading the Uncornered Market post, that part—I think a BIG part—of my love for photography is that it helps me make the experience tangible.To catch and hold that which is fleeting. To make the momentary last forever. It is the “stuff” my inner junkie craves. It allows me to record for all time that which will never be repeated. It makes memory a bit more concrete.

Not everyone gets this. Put the camera down, they say, look around.
I do look around, and I want to keep it forever.

From Experience to Memory

And this is where it all becomes very personal. Today, as I watch my elderly mother’s memory fade away and the details of her life’s story shift, twitch, blink, and disappear, some never to return, I get scared. And when other details miraculously reappear with amazing clarity when we open her photo albums, I know the importance of photography.

Someone—my father usually—thought that a particular moment was worth remembering forever. He, unaware in his young self, was extending her a lifeline that would stretch 60 years into the future, to a time when he would not be there to help her remember. He was fixing a bit of their lives—and her memory—in time. He was handing her a ticket back to her own life.

And today, as I watch her cling to the pieces of her life and wonder what lies ahead for me, I know, with even more conviction, how important my camera is to me.

Good Graf: Santiago Graffiti-Villavicencio

I love good graf. Graffiti art, street art, urban expression, bright colors, and freedom in design. And,in my opinion, Chilean graffiti is some of the best. As promised, I will be posting some of my “Good Graf” photos from time to time. (Remember Río Mapocho? And the “official” mural in front of Diego Portales?)

Graf fans… lucky day!

All of these Santiago graffiti shots were taken on May 14, 2009; the art is on a formerly blank wall along Av. Villavicencio, near Lastarria. Specifically, it’s the wall that was put up around the backside of the old Diego Portales Building reconstruction site  (soon to be the Gabriela Mistral Cultural Center). I’m calling it Villavicencio 336 because there was an address plaque with that address at one end.  Oh yeah, and a disclaimer… I know these were taken at the wrong time of day (yes, I do know those unsightly shadows do not reflect the artists’ best work–nor mine). These were grab shots taken with a fairly decent point and shoot that I keep with me at all times… a pretty handy thing for a blogging graffiti fan to have within arm’s reach!

I did a bit of poking around to find out who’s behind this work. It seems pretty clear that it’s a group work–there are individual pieces and certain styles that come through loud and clear, while other pieces seem to have contributions from multiple artists. But while I did come up with some leads, it will take more time than I have today folks, so if you already do know something about this work, I bet I’m not the only one who would like to know more!

Here goes, from left to right:

Birthday Love (MST Villavicencio 336)

This piece was off to the side and does not appear to really be part of the rest of the wall.

Vazko/Basco? Piguan? Santana? (MST Villavicencio 336)

I originally thought this was a Vazko (Basco)… but there’s a name written on top that makes me wonder. Also, his work and Piguan’s are similar in some ways and I KNOW Piguan was there that day, but no other clues lead me to Vaszko. Does anyone know for sure?

**Update** Now I’m thinking this is Santana, one of the KiltrV group… Still want confirmation!

Nebs Pereira "We Are C3" (MST Villavicencio 336)

I found a Flickr site for We Are C3. Note it’s in English. Wonder why…
And a reference to the  Santiaguino street artist Nebs Pereira who signed the piece. His blog Arte Ingrato has great work but takes forever to open.

Piguan Woman (MST Villavicencio 336)

Piguan is another Santiago graf star…so here… take a closer look:

Piguan Woman Detail (MST Villavicencio 336)

You can see more about Piguan and his work at Spacejunk.

(MST Villavicencio 336)

(MST Villavicencio 336)

tp? Josefa? (MST Villavicencio 336)

Wild Style tag (MST Villavicencio 336)

More wild style (MST Villavicencio 336)

Miners (MST Villavicencio 336)

These three pieces are separate but united and are the only ones with such clear social commentary. Look at the different artistic styles used here!

(MST Villavicencio 336)

Note the Mapuche kultrun (indigenous drum) in the central figure’s hand and the references to invasive, destructive logging practices.

Caliche. Food lines (MST Villavicencio 336)

Now for a special treat from the Colectivo KiltrV (Nebs, Santana, Naska, Piguan & Rayner)

Chilean Elections-Round 2 Brings Change…

I started writing this post this morning, thinking it would be a long, lazy day waiting for the election results to come in… and figured I’d pass the time rambling about the ins and outs of Chile’s electoral process. But I live in an area that gets lots of traffic whenever news is being made, and when more and more cars started going by around 6:15 with the classic beep-beep-BEEP- BEEP-BEEEEEP! I started checking the news: Guess what… I couldn’t have been more wrong. Today’s run-off second round of presidential voting ended in record time with the gran gol going to Sebastián Piñera, who topped Eduardo Frei in no time flat.

I had suspected Piñera would win, but truly thought it would be very close with counts and recounts continuing well into the night! As I write this, the streets are filling with cars, flags, cheers, and the blaring horns of the supporters of the Coalición por el Cambio—the right. And now, after 20 years of the Concertación (center-to-left), the Change has begun. Interesting times certainly lie ahead…

And just to avoid letting my earlier efforts go waste, here’s a bit about how Chile’s electoral process works

Who can vote…

* Men and women aged 18 and over can register to vote. The literacy requirement seems to have been dropped (although Chile does have a very high literacy rate).
* Women could not vote until 1949.
* Foreigners with 5 or more years of permanent residency in Chile can vote (citizenship not required).

Voting is compulsory…

Well, mandatory for those who have registered, anyway. All of the 7.5 million people who signed up to vote in 1989–the first election since 1970–and everyone since, have been locked into the system forever. Yep. Register once, you’re in for life…don’t vote, pay a fine…This means you must get out and go through the process not only for presidential elections, but every senator, congressional, and municipal election as well…which means that a lot of younger people simply don’t register. Forced apathy.

Make that Almost compulsory (the rules for getting around the rules)

For those who find registering to vote somewhat akin to getting a tattoo (a no-looking-back decision that seemed like a good idea at the time), never fear; there are certain ways of getting around it:

* just pay up (haven’t been able to confirm it, but the fine appears to range from 0.5 to 3 UTM. As of this writing, a UTM is $36.679 CLP or approximately $75 USD)
* head off to a distant beach. If you can prove that you were 200 km away from your designated polling place, you’re off the hook. Of course, it would just be cheaper to pay the fine (though certainly far less fun).
* prove you’re too sick—or unfit— to vote. We actually know someone who went through the trouble of getting a psychiatrist to declare him too nuts to vote (which, in retrospect, was a good thing. The shrink should probably be commended for this act of civic duty)
* Be a foreigner. Yep! Here’s a curious benefit for non-Chileans. Not only can we vote in a country of which we are not citizens, but we are even entitled to special privileges! We can vote if we feel like it… or not

Election Day is always a Sunday…

which is declared a legal holiday to make sure that people can get out and vote.

Enforced public teetotaling

We got together with friends for dinner last night. “Let’s meet early,” they said, “everything’s going to close up early because of the elections tomorrow.” Sure enough. The first thing our server said to us was “You might want to decide on your drinks first, I can only serve alcohol until 9PM.”

Wow. They take this stuff seriously. Midnight, I can see, but NINE? Of course we could have ordered 10 bottles and sat there all night, but pre-election last call was 9 PM!

Don’t know what that was all about, but the law says no alcohol can be sold from midnight before until 4 hours after voting has concluded.

Men & women vote separately

That’s right. From what people tell me, it’s so that men cannot influence their wives during the voting process. Seems kind of moot in a secret ballot process, doesn’t it?

You can imagine the inconveniences this can present… My elderly in-laws complain every time about the sheer logistics of it all.

Polling places are usually in schools or universities

And there are laws about how close the traffic can get to a polling site, which means that moving around the city on election day can be a complete adventure in and of itself.

Voting is by paper ballot

Voters sign in using their government-issued ID cards, sign their name in a book, and are given a paper ballot with the candidates’ names. They mark the ballot in secret with a pencil by drawing single vertical line through the line beside the candidate’s name. They fold the ballot as indicated, seal it with a special stamp, and deposit it in the box and dip their thumb in blue ink as proof that they’ve already voted. (BTW-  voters may not remain in the secret chamber more than 1 minute) (see Official Procedures).

Many people show their discontent with the options by turning in a blank ballot or by voting “nulo”–voiding their ballot–by marking it  in some unauthorized way. People have told me they draw pictures, write poetry, or vote for non-candidates; in fact, I heard something about Homer Simpson (yes, THAT Homer Simpson) receiving an unexpectedly high number of votes in one Santiago community today.

Better than half or do-over

In Chile it’s no simple matter of the candidate with the most votes win. Nope. This is a majority gets it kind of deal. When there is no clear majority (more than 50%), the top 2 candidates have a month to prepare and go at it again.

There have been 5 post-dictatorship elections. The last 3 have required run-offs. So today, Sebastián Piñera (Renovación Nacional, candidate from the right) duked it out with Eduardo Frei (Concertación / Democracia Cristiana, who, by the way, was president from 1994–2000, and whose father, Eduardo Frei Montalva, was president from 1964–1970, just before Salvador Allende).

I won’t bore you with the details of the first round, especially since I wasn’t even here at the time, but Eileen at Bearshaped sphere can certainly entertain you with a great photo-essay of her experience tagging along with a friend during the 1^st round. Be sure to check that out. And her latest tweets lead me to believe we can expect something equally enlightening tomorrow!

Late breaking news: Eileen, as predicted, has posted another great photo essay on the reveling right. See her piece “This is what democracy looks like. Chile Elections, 2010, Sebastian Piñera” on Bearshapedsphere.

Want more info? Check out:

Servico Electoral de la República FAQs (PDF)

Biblioteca del Congreso Nacional de Chile: Elecciones Presidenciales 2009